Pfft, I could do better then this.

... If we live in a world where lying to children for fun and profit is wrong, then I don't want to be right.

• 34. I am a large individual. Well over 6 foot and toping 130 Kg (although I don't think I'm THAT large, so I'm wondering where the hell all of it is kept. I'm the tardis of largess.) This, and a degree of experience, grants me an enormous advantage when it comes to drinking with friends. And yet the people I drink with try to keep up with me, beer (or other) for beer/other. This results in many humourous situations.

As a birthday present, my parents at one point bought me 'The Marvel Encyclopedia', a list of nearly all the Marvel characters. Since I am feeling lazy, here are some of my personal favourites in the list of the stupidest characters ever.

Ant Man II: The original Ant Man was just Giant Man using his powers in a different way (so his abilities were actually useful). But this guy ONLY had the ability to shrink. Seriously, there are only SO many situations that can be useful. "Where's Scott?" "He's looking under the couch for leftover change. Again."

Batroc the Leaper: He jumps. Seriously, that's it. He jumps really well. He jumps on top of people, apparently. His powers are listed as "Self professed master of Savate, the French form of kickboxing; allegedly an expert hand to hand combatant". The fact that they say 'self professed' and 'allegedly' to me makes it sound like... he isn't. And as much as I like the French (I genuinely do, I'm a fan of the French), they aren't known for unarmed combat. He's a crap practitioner of a bad martial art. Man, he's losing on ALL fronts.

Bi-Beast: One head on top of another. One has a full knowledge of an ancient race's warfare, the other their full knowledge of culture. That's it. He's just one of those ridiculously large, orange skinned aliens otherwise. With a large head with two faces. Whoever sat down and thought "This is gonna be SWEEET" should be put in a sack and beaten with a stick.

The Blob: Big, fat, tough guy. I get what his power is meant to be, it's just... c'mon... he's a big fat guy . Like. ROLLS of fat. More rolls-of-fat then man. You can't take that seriously as a supervillain

Boomerang: Yeah, he throws boomerangs. Some explode. Some release gas. They're still goddamned boomerangs.

Wolverine: I am doggamned sick of Wolverine.

Golddigger: She has no powers. All it really says about her is that she "Crossed paths with Captain America" Seriously, is a character wih no powers who gets screwed over that early REALLY worth a super-name? Even one as bad as 'Gold Digger'?

Jean Grey: Do I have to explain this? You real geeks out there will get what I mean. Amirite?

Left-Winger/Right-Winger: They didn't like the second Captain America, so they tried to have him killed, got their arses kicked in return. Wow. They were a good use of comic book pages.

Mad Thinker: An ugly guy who's really good with robotics. Wow, original. And dull as hell.

Madcap: I don't think I can do this justice, so I'll just type it all out. "A devoted member of a Christian church, Madcap began his descent into insanity following a terrible accident. He was traveling on a bus with his family and forty church members when it collided with a truck carrying an experimental nerve agent. Madcap was the only survivor and in the days that followed he developed the ability to heal himself and cause temporary insanity in others. He has used these talents to cause repeated havoc on the streets of new york. In between short spells in Bellevue Hospital, Madcap has encountered a number of superpowered individuals." Wow. Just. Wow.

I'm only halfway through the book, and I'm giving up there. There are a disturbing number of really... REALLY bad characters in comics.