Random bag

'The English sense of humour is subtle, and tinged with sarcasm. For example, you get Englishmen talking to one another, and one of them says "I passed by your house the other day" to which the other replies "Thank you."'
- Dave Allen

• 50. I blame YOU for all my shortcomings.

Ladies and gentlemen, as with a vast majority of this blog, I am about to steal someone else's idea. The 'X bag' (grab bag, random bag, twitter bag etc etc). I am going to post a number of random, small thoughts I've had that are not worthy of a post in and of themselves.

1. David and Goliath give me the shits. Thank you VERY much, both you tossers. Because of you (and many, MANY sports movies) the underdog is now no longer the underdog. He's the guy who comes back from certain defeat to win. The whole POINT of the David/Goliath situation is David wasn't meant to have a chance at winning! Now everything is a David/Goliath story, and David has a higher chance of winning then any Goliath. Because of you, D&G, the moment anyone is a Goliath they expect to lose.

Screw you David. Now, just to mess with everyone's head, I'm gonna ONLY ever cheer on the Goliath.



2. It's very easy to compartmentalise people. If you have no contact with them and they seem to be quite popular (in the thousands to hundreds of thousands of people knowing about them), though not "Can't walk down the street without screaming groupies" (E.G. Internet 'celebrities'), it is incredibly easy to just make the assumption they're not "Normal" people.

What brought about this revelation?

Some of you older readers may recognise the name Zendulo (from http://nerdgasm-unlimited.blogspot.com/2008/11/rules-of-net-name.html and http://nerdgasm-unlimited.blogspot.com/2008/10/rare-species-spotted.html), but for those who don't, here is a run-down. For a nerd like me, she is the PERFECT girl. Active, cheerful, nerdy MMO player who just so happens to be a ridiculously hot redhead with a sword collection. The fact that she lives in a completely different country is both a benefit and a detriment. Detriment since the chances of us ever meeting, sparks flying, and before I know it we're pwning each other in multiplayer games, is very very low. A benefit since I don't have to do the nerdy thing and pine after her from a distance worrying about how to approach without seeming really weird, since at this distance I simply can't approach.

With courage born of anonymity, I commented on her recent video (in which she's doing not much, talking about the kitchen, while casually holding a pair of nun-chucks. So awesome it should be illegal), to which she replied, to which I replied, to which she replied again. My first reaction was "Wow! Awesome to the power of awesome!" until I realised: Even though her channel has over a thousand subscribers and her most popular youtube video has 50,000 views (several order of magnitudes above the number of readers this blog gets), she is just a normal person. Albeit a very hot normal person who's requirement for her ideal guy is "must know what Mandalorian armour is".



3. I'm trying to read Waiting for Godot, but I'm always forgetting. I'm only a few pages in and liking it so far, but every time I read a bit I get distracted by something. I think I'm gonna have to see an actual production of it. Someone help me arrange seeing a production of Waiting for Godot.



4. Sent in a 15 page script today for a competition, in which if I'm lucky I could win $1,500, and the right to say "I won a stage plat writing contest." The money is a major bonus, but the encouragement would be like viagra to my writing confidence. Artifically, remaining for way longer then is comfortable, but I'm unable to perform without it.



5. For years I didn't think people who told themselves "Ok, I'll have one, then spend an extra few minutes on the treadmill tomorrow" existed. I thought they were just a caricature. Since getting an exercise bike, I've BECOME one. Since it's near my writing desk I can easily just tilt it right, reach my legs out, put them on the pedals and pedal backwards. Not as effective as actual pedaling, but I'll be damned if it doesn't make me feel better about myself. Buying that exercise bike: Best thing I've ever done.

P.S. I don't actually need viagra. Ladies. If that isn't a good reassurence, then nothing is.

P.P.S. Note to myself. Tomorrow's post, ladies and gentlemen, shall be dispelling the rumours and misleading information about the Bro-Code.