Attention Marvel Comics:
Fuck. You.
You're bringing Captain Marvel back already. ALREADY. For gods sake, the dude's not even been dead for three years. This is not a 'sensational plot twist', this is not a brave new move in story telling.
This is bullshit. Seriously, here you have the possibility to make a genuinely bold move in story telling, killing off and LEAVING DEAD a major, major character in your continuity. There is a reason it's known as 'comic book death', because there's never any threat to it. There's no threat and impact when a major hero in Marvel (and DC, to be fair) dies, since most of the time they'll be back with a new set of superpowers.
I read a relatively old issue of the X-Men a while ago which had the following exchange between Beast and an evil interdimensional Beast, as best I can remember.
Dark Beast: Nathan Summers may be of help.
Beast: He is dead.
Dark Beast: Still? The Summer's go back and forth so often I felt I had to make sure.
Your own characters are making fun of the "oh no he's dead how tragi-OH LOOK HE'S MAGICALLY ALIVE" nature of the comic book death. This is how completely undermined the massively horrible tragedy of death is.
Marvel, Too-Long-Didn't-Read version: I don't care if you planned it all from the beginning, bringing Steve Rogers back is a cheap move. Grow some testicles, get some testosterone injected, and have the courage to kill a major character in a dramatic moment and KEEP THEM DEAD.
P.S. If I hear ANY rumours that you're going to bring Uncle Ben back to life, I'm going to make you watch the new Punisher movie until you're crying blood.
Awwwwww... but brining uncle Ben back to life could be fun...
ReplyDeleteAnd then he could have a pet dinosaur, and go to the moon for holidays, and 'Little Eva' Boyd would stop by every second tuesday for tea and biscuits.
This is why franchised stories never work. I have yet to find an exception.
No wait! Hang on... I think I have an idea for a new spider-man comic!
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